tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2403223154281092605.post2721231599414036752..comments2023-08-17T08:55:52.643-07:00Comments on Emily Clarkson: Project 3: Storytelling and Commission- (Story refining)eclarksonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14109656778873436497noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2403223154281092605.post-52284214655242585782013-01-16T14:41:10.988-08:002013-01-16T14:41:10.988-08:00I agree with Phil!
A flashback of a former life w...I agree with Phil! <br />A flashback of a former life would be a great thing to see on screen! Your story is very strong and holds a good amount of comedy. <br />I can't wait to see your theme and imagery when you create your ideas for it! :D<br /><br />Well Done!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2403223154281092605.post-24377262415427214002013-01-15T20:08:08.693-08:002013-01-15T20:08:08.693-08:00Hey Emily :) Greetings from Orlando (it's 4am...Hey Emily :) Greetings from Orlando (it's 4am in the morning in the UK as I write this, but it's 11pm in Florida!). Okay, well I really love the idea of the former clown becoming a waiter in a restaurant, but being unable to repress his clowning as he does his job. There is a lovely synch-up between waiting on tables and out-of-work performers, which gives this idea real logic. The ending, in which the restaurant becomes famous for its clowning waiting staff is also promising. I've just checked out whether 'clown cowboys' is an established genre of performer - and it would appear that it is, so maybe your now-waiter was once a clown in a wild west circus...<br /><br />http://www.flickr.com/photos/39252242@N07/6991781526/<br /><br />... which gives you the lasso. I think therefore, you need to think about your structure, because this is going to need a flashback or some way to show the audience your waiter's former life in Act 1. Have a go at setting up your act 1, which needs to a) establish that he's applying for a job as a waiter, and b) that he used to be a entertainer, and c) that the restaurant itself is okay, but not hugely busy (because you need to show it improved in Act 3). Have a go :)<br /><br />tutorphilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11842833126210822641noreply@blogger.com